I can't let you go
Don’t make me say it, Don’t ask me for my opinion, don’t ask me for my decision, you don’t need to know,
But I just can't let you go.
With whom can I be so sure that I don’t have to say anything about how I am feeling and just perfectly knows it,
With you only, and I just can't let you go.
I dreamt, I prayed and wished with all my heart,
For this, and I lived my dream, but now my heart can't let it go midway.
I can see your love for me, your concern, your unrest in your voice.
I can't live to see you like this, but when my conscience tells me that letting you go can help you and put you in some kind of rest, then my heart painfully consents to make you suffer.
I haven't told you all this, not because I am not able to,
But because I know that you know it perfectly and any attempt to voice to you, will lose its value.
Why does God answer my prayers partly?
Go tell Him, that I won't let you go.
I am being selfish, I know, but for some reason , Don’t go away.
Please don't go away.
Don’t give up hope. Believe and we will be fine.
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LOVE, Anyway, Always
The pain I was going through doesn’t pain as much when I think that it pains more for you? It is the pain you can hear, you can feel, but not see.
I never knew it was possible to feel extremely depressed and filled with deep mirth when the dream you were living, the prayer you were saying gets answered.
I haven’t missed anyone in life, as much as I have missed you in the last 2 weeks.
I saw you in every post I wrote, I dreamt some dreams in some posts, I missed you so much in some as I erased some boundaries in my circles.
I discovered my own inner self, where I learnt not to voice my most grieving moments to anyone else than my pillow. For once, I felt, this grief is best told to none and I felt the pain am going through is nothing compared to yours.
I started this blog as a Dreamy blog to give vent, words to my dreams , today I come back to it after very long to ask the dreamer in me, if my life’s dream going take shape or crumble into pieces?
I can’t ask you just because I know it pains you more than it pains me. It is heart wrenching to hear a patience-personification shatter into low self-confidence levels and sounding so depressed and to think I am the reason for the unrest among your dear ones. In the years we have known each other, I have never heard you like this.
I never knew that it is possible not to get angry at somebody whose decision is not favorable to you, whose beliefs you don’t comply with and whose beliefs might mean a end of our cherished dream.
No courtship, no fights, but it was LOVE all the way and the reason was LOVE itself and silent admiration for each other.
The writer in me, the lover in me, the strength in me, the weakness in me, the mad-woman in me, I have seen it all. The entire month of posts all dedicated to you. Love you heaps.
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NOTHING
Doesn't anyone else feel the same way?
You still are going out with friends, watching movies, chatting on phone, keeping yourself busy at work, reading your favourite book and everything and yet, there is this........yeah, I am feeling that nothingness in ME.
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Maggi and Me
I have diligently read the Cooking directions on every pack of Maggi and have picked up a cooking hint from one of my aunts to add in a little extra water to make it tastier. Yes, I like my Maggi piping hot with that little extra soup. My recipe goes this, Add water and when it comes to a boil, add the tastemaker and after about 10 secs, add the Maggi. And Masala it is, any day.
With the many variations now with Maggi with scrambled eggs, with veggies, I love it just plain and simple still. The first thing I ever cooked on my own with no help from mommy and the first recipe for which I cut vegetables all by myself. Suprisingly though, I have never harped on maggi during the days I have lived and cooked on my own. The taste of Maggi is its best , I think, only when eaten at the cost of mom's anger, for rejecting her Sunday dinner and opting for Maggi.
I still remember the Yellow Maggi collectibles, bounce balls, cute little push cars. Yellow looks pretty only on Maggi collectibles and cover. Of all the memorable things I cherish about my childhood, here is to Maggi, my best loved snack. [Mom hates to call to it as Main course].
Now, writing so much about Maggi , how can one forget Rasna, which is just as good as Maggi. From the days of wanting the orange to show on your lips, to helping dad make the Rasna concentrate during summer with specially powdered sugar,stacking bottles of concentrate for the rest of the week, the color of that liquid concentrate on your fingers in your attempt, specially frozen ice cubes to serve them, breaking those ice cube trays with joy, sipping cold Rasna always completes a perfect sunday on a summer holiday. I recently went Grocery shopping when mum was away and splurged on things like Milkmaid, Rasna Lemon ( instant mix- no sugar -the TANG style) and everytime I make myself a glass of that, realise nothing beats the RASNA, the old traditional way. Not even, my obssesion for Tropicana.
In these TANGy days, what prompted me to write this post was the latest Maggi ad on TV, Me and Meri Maggi.
Scream it the Maggi way. Magggggggggggggiiiiiiii.. Can you hear me? Relive those Maggi ad days here.
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The Frustrating Sunday evenings
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Tagging myself..
I blog...
because I like to write.
I am thinking about...
just myself and What I can do to myself, to stop me from thinking all that I am thinking right now.
I want to...
Live life with the theme I have coined myself - "bottomless optimism"
I wish...
life is a bit more complex.
I hear...
only when I want to.
I wonder...
what I would be , if i had a recall button in life.
I regret...
no decision in my life, thus far. I have thought a great deal before making some of them and some of them made unconsicously.
I am...
a dreamer
I dance...
in my dreams.
I sing...
my mind aloud, in this blog with no music.
I am not always...
the same person to all.
I write...
to give my dreams and thoughts a font.
I confuse...
myself with my confused, convoluted thoughts.
I need...
to now finish this post.
And finally...
I am happy having picked this tag up myself.
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About Me
- Doozie Dreamer
- Blissfully in my mid twenties.
Staunchly independent
Stunningly unpredictable.
Predictably random.
But well worth the pact of friendship.
For more, you ought to read here